Image Courtesy: Rediff.com

Dear NRI Bhakts,

It is my humble request that you return back to Ramrajya, we are all living in harmony.

It is refreshing to let you know that we have all been credited with 15 lakhs in our account, we do not have any beggars in India any more.

The country is flowing with milk and honey.

Ganga is the cleanest River in the world this has been confirmed by UNESCO.

Ram temple has outclassed the Vatican.

Varanasi is better than Keto.

All international travellers have dumped the statue of liberty for the statue of unity, as a matter of fact it is has been confirmed by UNESCO that it is the biggest tourist attractions world over.

We have 2 crore surplus jobs and these have no connections with either Pakodas or Chai.

A uniform civil code has been successfully implemented,
Our farmers are one happy lot, all their demands have been met.

Implementation of OROP has the entire armed forces gleaming with joy.

Kashmiri Pandits have all returned safely to Kashmir except actor par superior Anupam Kher after the block buster performance in the Accidental Prime Minister he is expected to migrate to Hollywood.

We have 1000 smart cities, they have put Singapore, Hongkong, Dubai and Shanghai to shame.

Biharis are enjoying their special package as announced during 2015 assembly elections.

Congress had no clue about FDI, GST and AADHAR, as you are aware BJP are the most intelligent lot they have successfully implemented them and all and the citizens are happy epically in the unorganized sector which is now thriving with joy.

All our villages are connected with the grid, everyone enjoys un-interrupted power supply.

LPG cylinders are used by those in the most remotes of village as they are extremely cheap.

We all travel by the Bullet Train.

Scams are a thing of the past since all BJP politicians daily bathe in milk.

Women in India are now completely safe. A young woman can safely walk the loneliest road alone, anywhere in India at midnight whether in Delhi, Haryana or Mumbai. Rapes are a thing of the past.

All our holy cows are safe they are all well looked after, they do not eat thrash or plastic any more, Beef export has completely been banned and we are breathing extremely good quality of oxygenated air thanks to them. Cancer is something that does not bother us at all, basically we have the cure for all diseases “Cow Urine” the medical cure.

Rupee is at it all time high.

Petrol prices are at its all-time low.

De-monitisation was a big success, it has broken the backbone of the terrorist and most.

Black money is a thing of the past; we have all migrated to ‘deegeetal’ transaction(s).

Only Hindus, Buddhist and Sikh are now living in India, the rest have all opted for Gharwapsi or have relocated to Pakistan.
All Rohingyas and Bangladeshis have been successfully deported back to their respective countries.

Please don’t slog abroad get your a… (expletive) back here where you belong. You guys have worked hard, your love and support for Modi has made all the difference. You do not know what you are missing.

Our gutters are our prised natural resource, they supply us with unlimited natural gas and since Modiji has discovered the extra 2ab our Scientists and Mathematician are gone all gaga over it, they think it’s bigger than Brahmagupta and Aryabhatta discovering and using Zero.

So please come back urgently and show some love for your country, it’s time to get fit and sell Chais & fry Pakodas.

Big thank you.

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