Once upon a time there  was a 15 year old boy called Hamid, who went shopping on the day of Eid with his Eidi .  A few days ago there was Junaid who went shopping on the eve of Eid.  Premchand’s Hamid was an orphan and lived with his grandmother in extreme poverty. 

Junaid lived surrounded with love of his brothers, a sister, a doting mother, father and friends. Instead of the old, decrepit house of Hamid,  Junaid’s house has two rooms, it is not falling apart but it’s size and unplastered walls, do speak about the economic condition of his family.

As we approached Khandawli, Junaid’s village in Ballabhgarh a fear gripped me.  I did not have the courage to walk upto the house.  Junaid was brutally murdered on 22nd and here I was on 25th.  It was too soon, my mind said.  I should have let Eid pass.  But how could I have prepared Sewai in my house when a mother like myself had lost a young, healthy, happy child to hindutva fanatics?  I am a mother, I was angry and ashamed at home. And here, standing outside Junaid’s door, I was weak and helpless. Useless too.

Junaid’s grandfather met us outside the house, his daughter-in-law was unwell and Junaid’s father had gone to Police station.  We sat  down on the charpais and tried to tell him that we were not from a political party nor were we Journalists.  But he had not even asked us who we were! He wasn’t waiting for us or anyone in particular. All he said was, “We want ‘aman’, why did we fight against the British? So that we could live in our country with peace. Pardhan Mantri is the ‘maa and baap’ for all citizens, if he wants he can get us justice,”.  This man had faith in Modi!!! He was hoping Modi would be able to get him Justice!!! I guess he just had old time innocence.

He let us go to the terrace to meet Junaid’s mother, Saira. There she was, stony eyed, not a tear, only a wail coming out of her.  Her daughter was combing her hair while two ladies from the neighbourhood were sitting beside her, silently listening to Saira’s chilling wail, as if it had frozen them. I froze too.  I sat in front of her but kept away.  Gunit, my friend, had the courage to sit next to her and hold her hand. Gunit started talking and after what seemed like a very long time later, Saira, responded with tears and ‘mera beta’, ‘mera beta’, ‘moh ko ek hath se Utah leta tha’ , ‘abhi hafiz bana tha’, ‘amma naya suit pehan ke aiyo mere madarse mein’ ‘amma sabko dawat denge’ ‘jo jo usne kaha bibi maine sab kiya’,  “jab hafiz baniyo tab main gayi to maulana ka kapda, unki biwi ka kapda, saare Bachchon  ka khana  le ke gayi, yahan se Jane se pehle Maine inko apne paas se paise nikaal ke diye our 10-10 ke naye note mangwaye, wahan dawat ke baad har bachche ko 10-10 rupaiye diye.   Itta khush, itta khush ho gaya mera beta, bola amma tu toh kamaal kar di, har bachcha tujhe hi yaad  karey  hai madarase mein, ke jo junaid hafiz bana toh hamey 10 ka naya note mila, tu too mashoor ho gayi amma!!! aur khoob hanse  tha!!! Abhi sehri mein moh se kunda le ke chal diyo ke amma tu baith aaj mein tujhe khilaonga…….” Saira kept describing Junaid’s innocent boyhood and we all cried with her. Saira’s question – ‘lekin kyon, mere beta toh rozey se tha, bhooka-pyasa, woh kaisey kuch kha sakta tha’ is still resounding in my ears. Saira knew Junaid was called a cow-eater before being killed. Ramzan is over and now Eid has passed too.  Unlike Premchand’s Hamid who lived in Hindustan, Junaid lived in a Hindu Rashtra. So did Najeeb and Rohit Vemula. I can still see Rohit’s mother marching with the protestors, Najeeb’s mother being forcefully carried away by police and Pehlu Khan’s 80 year old mother wiping her tears! Why is it that in a hyper masculine fascist agenda – woman is the biggest looser?

The disappearances, suicides, public floggings and lynchings are not  spontaneous acts of hurt-sentiments-venting-out by ‘Hindus’ as our BJP-RSS leaders have been claiming. Rohith Vemula was reduced to ‘his immediate identity, a vote, a number’ in his own words, he was marginalised and ignored to the extent of suffocation. Junaid must have felt the same suffocation.

Rohit was driven to suicide, Junaid was murdered, and no one was responsible! This indifference and numbness towards the lives of minorities is typical of Brahminical gaze. Can such people create a non-casteist Hindu Rashtra, as claimed by BJP-RSS? Will a Hindu Rashtra make our problems disappear?  What will happen if all muslims were eliminated from India? Will you have better roads, clean water, clean ganga, no pollution, no land mafia, no rapes, no murders, no beggars, no poor, no unemployed, no homeless, no farmer suicides? Why then do Indian Hindus go crazy over this idea of Hindu Rashtra? The movement is already violent and till now it has only delivered political power to the likes of Modi and Amit Shah. To keep us engaged like irritant kids, they have dumped upon us the idea of Hindu nationalism. Nationalism requires symbols that arouse emotions.  And since RSS or Hindutva-wadis didn’t play a role in the actual nationalist movement of India during the freedom struggle they are creating these symbols now. They have to re-write history and re-wire people’s understanding of history.  The truth is their ideologue, ‘Veer’ Savarkar, originator of the concept of hindutva petitioned the British government several times when he was in Jail, betraying the national movement:
 

• “…if the government in their manifold beneficence and mercy releases me, I for one cannot but be the staunchest advocate of constitutional progress and loyalty to the English government…I’m ready to serve the government in any capacity they like….”

(Savarkar’s letter asking for forgiveness dated November 14, 1913 is reprinted in a book, Penal Settlement In Andamans, published by the Gazetteers Unit of Union ministry of education.)

When a political party inspired by Savarkar, who was ready to be a loyal servant of the British, wants to take charge of Independent India, they know they have no roots. But ‘others’ do! Muslims have deep roots in India and were also at the forefront of the freedom struggle. RSS can’t digest that. They are trying hard to claim Ambedkar’s legacy but not of Ashfaqullah Khan or Barakatullah of Ghadar party or Khan Abdul Ghaffar Khan who spent 45 years in Jail!  They uproot the ‘other’. A road in Aurangzeb’s name is not acceptable but to hang the portrait of Savarkar with Mahatma Gandhi, inside the Parliament?!!!

History is distorted, manipulated and created to suit a rootless Hindu nationalism. Since minorities can’t be sent to gas chambers, they have to be either invisible or assimilated. Their identities  have to be wiped out for the hindu nationalist to feel rooted in Hindu rashtra. Any visible identity markers like skull caps and beards must lead to mob lynchings, while the hindu fanatics wear their religion on their sleeves! A gathering of muslims terrify hindus, a lot of them tell me they are scared of venturing into the ‘muslim areas’.  Earlier the refrain was ‘all terrorists are muslims’, can I now say ‘all lynchers are hindus’?  No.  I have to qualify them as ‘fanatics’!  Hindu nationalists did this to Sikhs too. In the anti-sikh riots of 1984 a lot of Sikhs had to cut their hair and beards for fear of being identified. Dalits live in mortal fear of being looted, murdered or raped at the slightest resentment.  Shabbirpur village in Saharanpur is a recent witness of domination by force.  And the propaganda is that Hindus are the most peaceful race!

All these years of demonising muslims has created a consensus among the general Janta too about the ‘place’ of muslims in India.  It is either ‘muslims should behave themselves’ or ‘get out’ of India. What behaviour? “To live like second grade citizens, to not have the right to vote, to live at the mercy of Hindus, to be plundered and raped in our graves”, as claimed by Yogi’s outfit. Yogi is not fringe, he is not an extremist, he is a mainstream politician elected by Hindus. Why do hinds elect such people again and again? Is this what they want? This “putting muslims in their place” is not a new phenomenon, I remember the other black Eid in 1987 when VHP painted the walls in Meerut with the slogan, “If you want to live in India, live like Hindus”. In 1991, it became, “Hindustan main rehna hai to Jai Shri Ram kehna hoga”. Why? Hindu Rashtra belongs to manuwadi, brahminical Hindus, majority of whom have turned against Indian muslims. Indian Muslims are treated like a punching bag on which nationalist hindus take out their anger, frustration, irritation. By hitting the muslims, hindus de-stress themselves, it works like a feel good factor.  They use the free Hindu licence (issued by Modi sarkar) to vent out on muslims or dalits. Moreover they also have the guarantee of ‘No Witnesses’ so they can hound us publicly, as a pack, tamasha is in full swing. Else there wouldn’t be 200 people on the railway platform, all of whom  saw NOTHING when Junaid and his two brothers were stabbed in broad daylight. Sure there are those who stand in protest with Indian Muslims. Be thankful to them but know that it is not enough.

Lynchings are psychological too. They happen in offices, parties, parks, neighbourhoods.  My identity has been reduced to my name hundreds of times! Anyone at any time can point a finger at us and call us – Pakistani, anti national, Babar ki aulad, Aurangzeb ki aulad, mullah, katuey, kat-mullah, beef eater, ….They don’t care if these ‘names’ hurt us! They may do so as a joke, “c’mon yaar don’t be so serious”, “madam, aap zyada hypersensitive ho”, using both ‘hyper’ & ‘zyada’ when I feel bad but when the hindu feels bad, it becomes a matter of ‘insult to the nation’ or ‘insult to hinduism’.  This ‘anti-national muslim’ construct, has been created by no less than our Prime Ministers. In 1983 Assam elections, Vajpayee and Advani, backed with RSS, successfully turned the local Assam agitation into an anti-muslim ferment.  They fanned hatred by calling Assamese muslims ‘outsiders’ in their own homeland. Vajpayee had said, “Foreigners have come here; and the government does nothing.  What if they had come into Punjab instead, people would have chopped them into pieces and thrown them away”.  And sure enough 4000 muslims were hacked to death in the Nellie massacre, within a few months of his speech.

Moradabad. Nellie. Hashimpura. Ayodhya. Bombay. Gujarat. Muzzafar nagar…….
Vajpayee. Advani. Modi. Amit Shah. Yogi….
Muslim monster. Riots. Elections…

This is what we are up against: Ruthless politicians armed with politics of hate. The fact that it yields rich political dividends is a no brainer but the fact that majority of Hindus vote for them is telling of the community.  Advani himself had said, “Had I not played the  Ram factor effectively, I would have definitely lost from the New Delhi constituency,” (18.06.1991).  Vajpayee didn’t lag behind either, during the same election campaign, he claimed that the construction of ‘Ram temple at Ayodhya was necessary to save the honour of the Hindu community’ (TOI, 13.05.1991).  Sushma Swaraj called the construction of temple in place of mosque, “a matter of national honour”.  Ashok Singhal said no excavation was necessary as “temple is a matter of faith and identity of crores of Hindus”.  Therefore, No litigation. No court. Justice delivered by the mob. Babri masjid was demolished to establish Ram mandir – a symbol of Hindu nationalism.

Modi openly laughed in his rallies across Gujarat, addressing Muslims as the community that lived by the philosophy of “hum paanch, hamare pachees”.  In his Gujarat Gaurav Yatra, he repeated, “We have to teach a lesson to those who are increasing population at an alarming rate”. In another address he referred to Gujarat riot victim’s camps as “breeding grounds and child producing centres” –  reducing the community to an ‘unwanted burden’ in the Hindu Rashtra. And yet Indian Hindus voted for him to become the Prime Minister. Why? In recent UP elections too he created a ‘kabristaan vs shamshaan’ and the ‘electricity on Eid vs Holi’ divide – presenting the muslims as the ones taking away from the hindu plate. His election rallies end with ‘Bharat mata ki jai or Vande matram’ but does he really care for mata, matram or mothers? Maybe Rohit’s mother or Najeeb’s mother, will be able to tell.

Cow is the new symbol of honour of the Hindu community.  Cow is said to be the mother of brahmin Hindus.  I wonder, for this mother to have her “rightful place” in the history of Hindu Rashtra, how many muslim mothers will loose their sons and husbands to lynching mobs? Sadhus and Sadhvis equated the lynchers with Bhagat Singh!!! It is a Public Honour. The ignorance and arrogance of it all is stupefying.  And once again: No litigation. No court. Justice is delivered by the mob. A nationalist mob, the Gau Rakshaks are honourable citizens with complete immunity from the state.

BJP and its Hindutva brigade has blood on it hands. It is blood thirsty still. It is  desperate for 2019…And Hindus* may vote for them yet again!

Indian muslims are the first game in the slaughter chain, while being accused of appeasement! It’s a double whammy! It is cleverly coded communal politics. The idea is to keep us in a continuous state of riots, relief camps, repression. The idea is also to make the biggest minority irrelevant in India.

Are the Indian Muslims ready to take on this fight against a communal state, a complicit state machinery and at best an indifferent majority? No. Because we are the most socio-economically backward community, worse off than Dalits. Indian governments will not provide ‘muslim areas’ with development infrastructure like schools, drainage, roads, water,…but will spread the propaganda that muslims do not want to study, that we are unhygienic, that we want to live in ghettos.  We have to be a “self-made” community. We have to build everything on our own – schools, colleges, dispensaries, hospitals, parks, drains, whatever and then go out and compete in the mainstream.  There will be social biases. We have to defy it all.

Indian muslims have been at the margins for far too long, this has led to the belief that, ‘that’ is our place.  No. Let no Amit Shah tell us that we are here to repair cycle punctures.
* (All hindus may not vote for BJP-RSS but all those who vote for Modi are Hindus)

Today, the truth is that majority of Indian Hindus sway to the tune of Modi whether it is the foot soldiers or virtual soldiers of hindutva, rural or urban, illiterate or educated. They are prisoners of Modi.

The truth is also that there are other minorities at the receiving end of hindutva fanaticism. Dalits. Sikhs. Christians.Tribals. The examples speak for themselves. The Dalit and Akali movements are strong enough to force BJP-RSS to appease them, even if through politics of tokenism. Muslims must learn and learn fast from these movements. A grass root movement of our own that reaches out to build solidarities with other vulnerable groups like Dalits, SCs, STs, LGBT,…is required. The only way to break the hindutva narrative is through alliance, progressive ideology and education. We must recognise and acknowledge our allies, respect their integrity and camaraderie.

Remember we have been the punching bag, we have been hit too hard for too long.  It’s our turn to come back like the punching bag and hit the brazen fanatics in the face.  It is possible to knock them down!

Courtesy: Kafila.online
 

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The deeper I dig into my childhood the more I find such instances. Our neighbours often commended my mother on keeping the house ‘so clean despite being a Muslim’. Now I remember how much effort went into scrubbing the floors. My mother scrubbed them in the morning and she made me, her eldest child, scrub them in the evening. None of my girlfriends nor their mothers cleaned their floors in evening, cleaning was a morning chore except in our house. Now I know why – it was all an effort to prove that we were just as clean as any of the Hindu families around us. We were always trying to please our Hindu neighbours but they kept on demanding more and more.  The entire effort went to waste when our neighbours visited but refused to recognize a ‘clean Muslim home’. All they would say was, “but you are not like Muslims”. Imagine, they were ‘seeing’ our house every day but they refused to accept it as ‘reality’, they continued to believe in the stereotype of a ‘dirty Muslim household’. The reality, the truth that they “saw” would just not register over their belief! Why? Because they wanted to believe in their “narrative” of supremacy.

When I was in class 6 or 7, that famous India-Pakistan cricket match happened, in which Javed Miandad hit a six on the last ball.  There we were, glued to the television waiting to applaud for India and in my heart, for my secret crush – Ravi Shastri too.  But Javed Miandad spoiled it all for us, I remember my brother cried when we lost that match. The next day in school when everyone was discussing cricket, I was shut up by simply being told – “Oh, you must have celebrated yesterday, after all, your side won.” I was stunned into silence. Everyone had presumed that ‘my’ side was the ‘Pakistani side’.

Where did all this come from?  From my class mates who were my age, 12 or 13, with similar middle class backgrounds or were they mouthing their parents’ presumptions?  I had forgotten these incidents and moved on but now, the aggressive Hindu has forced me to look back – I realise how desperately I had wanted to ‘belong’ to my friends but I was denied entry into the club that somehow had more claim to India and Indian-ness than me. The message that I took home that day was – ‘I was different so I did not  belong’. 

This is the same ‘difference’ which a Dalit, a Scheduled Caste or any person from a minority community feels. As a person of minority, one has to struggle to be recognized as ‘equal citizens’ of India.  This recognition has been particularly denied to Muslims in India.  The message is not just that we do not ‘belong’, we are also assumed to be ‘traitors and allies of Pakistan’ thus making us ‘unpatriotic’. One is alienated from the mainstream, her self-worth as an ‘individual’ is denied, it instills in the minority the order of second grade citizenship.

All this happens at a very early age, an impressionable age. It made me more vulnerable and was perhaps my first experience of being told about my second grade status in my own country, a country, which the school text book reminds us is the biggest democracy in the world.  I was alienated in a shared space – ‘my’ school.  I was assumed to be ‘unpatriotic’ at the age of 12 or 13.

And so I did the next best thing, I tried to merge and be like everyone else. I started rebelling from my own religious background.  I studied translations of Quran and found flaws with respect to women’s status in it, slowly I developed a “sort of” feminist narrative on Islam. In it, I found elements of patriarchy, misogyny, gender inequality and all other flaws of an organized religion. I did not realize that I was still following the ‘Hindu’ narrative about a Muslim. I argued with my father, when all he wanted was that I pray to God, once a day. 

I gave up my religion by the age of 17 when girls around me were still fasting for Santoshi mata or Guruwaar or Shani dev or some other diety. At 17 you only understand ‘liberal’ in a skin-deep sense. So I became liberal in the way I dressed, ate and lived my college life, completely aligning myself with upper caste Hindus.  I should have been shocked at my “religious Hindu girl friends” but I was not.  I was a ‘subject’ of the Hindu Brahminical narrative. 

So strong was the grip of this majoritarian narrative that I, a rebel-Muslim, failed to question my friends. But a questioning mind cannot be dulled. Sooner than later I discovered the flaws in Hinduism, it too had misogyny, gender in-equality and patriarchy. I realised that a ‘liberal Hindu’ mindset is just a disguise for a ‘Brahminical’ mindset. If liberalism does not allow you to break the barriers of race and caste, if it does not filter out hatred for minorities than how can you call yourself a liberal?

During my college days, I lived in my jeans and tees, much like any other urban girl. At every introduction, at every mention of my name – I was told, “oh! But you do not look like a Muslim.” What does a Muslim woman look like? Again, I was not acceptable as a non-hijab wearing modern Muslim woman! They saw me every day yet denied my modern identity.  I was ‘invisible’ to them.  They wanted to stick to notions of a ‘hijab wearing Muslim woman’ and when I did not conform to their narrative, they called me an exception! 

Just like our ‘clean home’ was an exception, my ‘patriotism’ was an exception, my ‘modern identity’ too was an exception! But why? Because stereotypes create Islamophobia and Islamophobia simply helps to establish Hindu Supremacy.

So well disguised was this denial of my identity that initially I was pleased at my ‘liberal identity’ but slowly I began to feel some anger as these remarks were thrown at me often. Things changed drastically when I went to study Film & Television at Jamia Millia Islamia University. Now that I look back, I feel I got into the prestigious institute because in my interview, I was able to present to the panel, a positive review of Salman Rushdie’s Satanic Verses, it was a ‘liberal’ panel of interviewers. The book was banned in India but my father had managed to bring a copy home which he kept hidden from us. I read it secretly at night. 

Maybe my approach to Satanic Verses helped me. Once I joined the course, my mind opened up to new experiences, this is where I began to understand the concepts of ‘othering’, ‘us & them’. But by now I was so used to following the Hindu narrative about Muslims that I constantly judged Muslim students outside my center as conservative, hard-core fundamentalists. Anyone who had a beard was a fundamentalist and I did not want to associate myself with him. So strong is the grip of this narrative on me that even today I want to tell Muslim men to be ‘more normal’, to be like anyone else and merge in the mainstream. 

Why should they have beards? Why should the women wear burqa? Why do they look different? Why don’t we give (Hindus) the Ram Mandir? Why don’t we change our profession from being butchers to some other? When it came to matters of identity I was calling ourselves – ‘them’.  

The penny dropped. When did I start subscribing to the majoritarian narrative and criticizing people for the way they dressed, ate, earned their living? Why was I pleased at being a liberal Muslim? Were my neighbours and colleagues friendly because I did not look like a Muslim? What if I wore a hijab and was a practicing Muslim? Recently a ‘Muslim senior citizen’ was denied a seat in a Delhi metro! Isn’t it alienation in a shared public space? What then happens in other such spaces – schools, colleges and offices – is anybody’s guess.

The deeper I dug, the more I realized how convoluted were my own thoughts about myself. In fact my entire family scrutinizes and criticizes conservative Muslims ruthlessly while singing classical Bhajans at friend’s ‘Pujas’. Is it an attempt to appease them? We celebrate Holi and Diwali like all Hindus. My daughter lights up the house with lights and diyas on Diwali and our neighbours appreciate it. But on Eid, ours is the only house that is lit up, no neighbor has accepted Eid as their own festival. Clearly the majority has never wanted to please its minority but is very loud and vocal on ‘appeasement of minorities’.  

Ironically, a narrative of ‘Hindu victimhood’ has been at play since 1980s, it has led to several riots in which more Muslims have been killed than Hindus. Every riot sets back the minority community by at least a generation. It takes away the home that was built over a period of 20 years, it takes away savings, security, livelihood, not to mention lives of loved ones. I will not even touch on rapes and arrests of innocent Muslims. 

But the Hindu goes on believing in his ‘victimhood’ and in his acts of faith. To the Muslim, he repeats the same questions, why do Muslims live in ghettos? Remember what happened to Akhlaq who did not live in a ghetto? Why does the Muslim community not help their women? Muslim women need as much help as Hindu women. Why are they so conservative?

Why are there separate laws for Muslims? Are there?!!!! Why don’t the Muslims want uniform civil code? Really!!!??? All Muslims may not be terrorists but all terrorists are Muslims??!!! Only as much as all rioters are Hindus. Are the gau-rakshaks not bhakshaks? Clearly these Hindus have not known any Muslim, nor do they know their own faith.

Muslims in India face a double-edged sword of economic and cultural alienation. They are pushed to live in ghettos, they have spent past 70 years in fear of riots. Only those who are willing to give up their religion (like me) and merge with Brahminical narrative can hope to rise economically and socially. They are psychologically crushed by attacks on their cultural practices, eating habits, dressing style and professions. They are easy targets for the police and the mob. They can be lynched, beaten up, killed in encounter or be in jail for 23 years before being declared innocent. They can’t rent a house, get their child admitted to a good school or a house help to work for them.

Who will take the blame for this narrative of ‘othering’ the Indian Muslim? An average liberal hindu is upset when people like me refuse to follow his narrative. He is horrified that I have decided to ‘de-subjectify’ myself and assert my equal status, my first-grade citizenship in India. My ‘liberal Hindu’ friend expects people like me to not raise my voice – for he alone has the right to criticise ‘his PM’, ‘his government’, ‘his army’ and ‘his motherland’?!!!

He does not want me to react to communal killings or state atrocities, not even state policies. He simply does not want me to have an opinion forget criticizing political ideologies. He is also not willing to look at facts, figures, documents, history.  He is the one who eats eggs, fish, chicken, mutton and pork, he drinks scotch, he is well dressed, he is educated and has a white collar job. In fact he even relishes my Biryani. He is the one whose daughter can choose to marry anyone except a Muslim man…

And lastly he expects me to be grateful to him for allowing me to live in India, imagine what my life would be in Pakistan?!!!

Let us make it clear that I or the Indian Muslims have nothing to be grateful for, to the Hindus in India. That we refuse to play your game in the name of ‘liberal forces’. You are not liberal if you have deep seated hatred for minorities. India, world’s biggest democracy is a farce, it is a mis-recognition of the system of democracy. True democracy in India can only be established through its minorities – a solidarity of  religious, caste and indigenous minorities.

P.S. By any chance, if you feel threatened by burqa or a skull cap and beard – so be it! I’m not going to change till I want to. Deal with it.

Sabiha Farhat is a television professional and writer based in Delhi.

Courtesy: kafila.online 

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